As I sit here trying to type this blog, there are bottles and coffee mugs crowding my coffee table, baby everything hiding our apartment floors, and a sleeping baby laying across my body. It is also only 8:45am and I'm typing with one hand. The apartment won't look messy for too long :) Justin and I are doing our best to keep our place somewhat tidy and clean, with the two of us splitting up tasks it hasn't been that hard, but more about our team work on another blog in the future. It is no surprise that life changes significantly when you have a baby, but there are a few things that change that you probably had never thought of. Well, at least i hadn't. So in the interest of time, mostly my time, here it is: you know you're a mom when...
...Poop is exciting - no seriously! if you've ever seen a constipated baby you know what I'm talking about. A baby who poops is a happy baby so yes, you will get excited when you see that little "poop face" and you will be happy to see her so focused trying to pass a bowel movement, but above all even if you thought you would dread changing diapers, you will more than gladly change a poopy diaper any time. So yes, no matter how hard you try not to, you will get excited when poop is on its way.
...Farts are delightful and so are burps - yup you read that right! watching a gassy baby twist and turn in pain is so sad, so when you hear those little farts pass through and those manly burps come up you will smile. Gas coming out of a baby means baby will be happy and once again happy baby, happy momma. But, I should clarify only baby farts and burps are delightful everyone else... please stick to Western culture at keeping it in til you're alone :)
...You master one handed tasks - oh yea, typing, eating, preparing a bottle, cooking, cleaning, you name it, you will learn to do it with one hand because chances are the other one will be busy holding baby. Also, you might get good at grabbing and moving stuff with your feet!
...Getting out of the apartment is like winning a noble prize - diapers, extra outfits, bottles, dressing yourself, dressing the baby, changing the baby after she poops or has a spit up right as you were walking out the door, getting the stroller ready, blankets, extra pacifiers, and any other baby related things you can imagine. Once you're out though, it feels great, you feel like a champ and you enjoy every single minute of it!
...Going to the grocery store is fun - read the above :) so yes, getting out is hard and sometimes a day or two will go by before you realize you haven't been outside. It gets better as baby gets older. The thing is it makes you appreciate and enjoy even the most routinely outings.
...Sleeping at least 4 hours at a time is like climbing Mt. Everest - whether it's at 10am or 10pm going to bed for 4hrs in a row is glorious! "Sleeping like a baby" - never has there ever been a more deceiving colloquial phrase! Babies don't sleep deep for long, their sleep cycle lasts maybe 50-60min (compared to 90-100 for an adult). Now 50% of this cycle is spent in REM (Rapid Eye Movement state) which is the state of sleep cycle where one is most likely to awaken. This means baby only spends 25-30min in deep sleep the rest of the time the sligthest involuntary twich, gas, or a new dream will upset and wake up baby and then once again you gotta get them to sleep. So no, babies don't sleep deeply for long hours at least not til they're 2-3yrs old and then they're no longer "babies" so I think I've proven that there has never been a more untrue phrase than "slept like a baby"
...Toothless smiles are adorable - up to baby I associated toothless smiles with the elderly (Lou Pickles from Rugrats anyone? or Hey Arnold's grandpa & grandma?) not particularly cute or gross, just a sign of aging. Well since Kiki started smiling socially and way more often toothless smiles have gained a new meaning. They're cute, they make me smile, and they're just hands down a cure for even the toughest day.
To be continued...